Learning to finish well

The year started strong. I was diligent in my Bible readings, serving Christ in joy and growing in community. 

More recently, my life has been dry -- at least on the inside. This post is a self-reflection on my struggle to finish well, not on how to finish well. The latter I still need to learn.

It started a couple months ago. I made three dangerous choices:

1. I fought for a diligent and fervent prayer life.
2. I started sharing my faith.
3. I asked God for passion.

Shortly after a temporary high, 

1. I chose sleep over prayer, my job over my God;
2. I cared more for my comfort than the eternal destiny of others; and
3. I filled my life with the passions and cares of this world, giving little room for a sold-out heart for God.

My past self was resurfacing. Yikes! For example, Proverbs 12:16 says, "The vexation of a fool is known at once, but the prudent ignores [or overlooks] an insult." How easy it has been to be the fool rather than the prudent man.

A look on the surface tells me I struggle with anger problems. Looking deeper, I realize that anger is one of my many struggles of the flesh. And when I'm not abiding in Christ, the flesh often resurfaces. 

I do what I don't want to do, and I don't do what I want to do. Or as Paul so aptly wrote, "For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am!" 

It would be depressing if it ended here. Thankfully, Paul continues, "Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin." (Romans 7:22-25) 

And then, "Boom!" Romans 8. 

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