Total Annihilation >> Complete Determination
Oh man. Total annihilation. I got destroyed on my Operational Research exam. Should have used my time more wisely. Gah. My favourite course. I was doing really well... And then... kaput. And it was a second year course too. Man, so mad.
So I went to the gym. I tried to understand. Why can't I do well in OR courses? Same thing happened last year... I would say... Wow Cool! And not do well.... -_- Maybe I am not supposed to be where I thought I'd be. These were some of the thoughts that were going through my mind as I started working out.
Bicep curls... Bench Press... Tricep Press... Leg Press... Angry Press:p
Then I went upstairs to run. At first I was like 10 laps. As I was running, I was like, WOW.... 10 laps is long. Then wait... Edwin can do 5 km.... And 5 km = 35 laps. Ok.. I'll do that. Partway through I was doubting myself. But I kept running. Lap 10... Oh my... 25 laps to go... I kept at it... My foot was in pain... I'm going to finish this... No matter what... I can do it... I didn't let my intense pain get to me.... Mind over matter they say...
End of story? I ended up painfully finishing the 5k. Took me about 1/2 hour around the track. Hard... yes... But I know that I can do it. I know that I can finish and that even when I am down, I need to persevere, because finishing that 5 k is so much more rewarding then giving into my fleshly desires:p In the same way, this seemingly huge roadblock in my life (failing that exam) is going to hurt. But I need to keep running. I need to finish this race. And learn from my mistake. Choose this day. That phrase is taking on a deeper meaning everyday. And right now, Ada is beside me, supporting me, and affirming to me that everything is ok. I will fight. God, this battle, I commit to you. Please take it, use it, for your glory, not for my own gains.
So I went to the gym. I tried to understand. Why can't I do well in OR courses? Same thing happened last year... I would say... Wow Cool! And not do well.... -_- Maybe I am not supposed to be where I thought I'd be. These were some of the thoughts that were going through my mind as I started working out.
Bicep curls... Bench Press... Tricep Press... Leg Press... Angry Press:p
Then I went upstairs to run. At first I was like 10 laps. As I was running, I was like, WOW.... 10 laps is long. Then wait... Edwin can do 5 km.... And 5 km = 35 laps. Ok.. I'll do that. Partway through I was doubting myself. But I kept running. Lap 10... Oh my... 25 laps to go... I kept at it... My foot was in pain... I'm going to finish this... No matter what... I can do it... I didn't let my intense pain get to me.... Mind over matter they say...
End of story? I ended up painfully finishing the 5k. Took me about 1/2 hour around the track. Hard... yes... But I know that I can do it. I know that I can finish and that even when I am down, I need to persevere, because finishing that 5 k is so much more rewarding then giving into my fleshly desires:p In the same way, this seemingly huge roadblock in my life (failing that exam) is going to hurt. But I need to keep running. I need to finish this race. And learn from my mistake. Choose this day. That phrase is taking on a deeper meaning everyday. And right now, Ada is beside me, supporting me, and affirming to me that everything is ok. I will fight. God, this battle, I commit to you. Please take it, use it, for your glory, not for my own gains.
Comments
Just wanna say awesome job on the running because u finished the 5k but also cuz you finished what u put your mind to! I wanted to bring that mentality back into my working out or into it (for the first time) so I was like in so much pain while I was doing the extra 5 minutes but I was like I'm gonna do it no matter what!! It felt good to finish it:) You're a fighter and you'll get through this tough time with your exam/course but God is with you always!
Emily